"I Want Sex, Not Relationships"

There is a long story behind this blog but I will make it short--at another site that I blog at I wrote a piece about all the bad habits of fat people--obviously someone who didn't know my fat history commented about how I must hate fat people and how would I feel if he wrote a blog about gay people only wanting sex, not relationships--this is my answer to his comment--by the way his 'user name' is anonymous!!!! Seriously!!

I am not good at or in partner/mate/lover/spouse relationships--I, suppose, mainly because: 1) I prefer being alone 2) am too selfish 3) too controlling 4) unwilling to compromise just to name a few reasons.

I have ALWAYS put pleasure before business and most of my life I guess I would be defined as a sex addict. I am a great friend and, immodestly, fantastic in bed but the responsibilities of being in love are not for me. I tried, and failed, 4 times before I realized that going without a mate was the best thing for me emotionally and mentally. Dependency on others for anything is not something I deal with graciously and not something I want to deal with.

I don't know how true it is that gay men (not so women) are way more promiscuous than nongay men but that was one of the things I found/find so fascinating about being gay. Opportunities for sex seem to be much more available to gay men--anywhere, anytime and with anyone. It can be as anonymous as you want it to be and, yet, as intimate as you want it to be.

I have had sex so many times in so many varied places that it even boggles my mind!! LOL And I don't regret a single instance--though, of course, some times have been better than others.

In this aspect do I fit the stereotype of a gay man?? I don't care.

I have heard of monogamous gay couples--and I am sure many who blog here will attest to that--but in MY experience I have not seen it Sad, how after a couple break up, you find out that they haven't been faithful.

Maybe since AIDS has come on the scene, and mainly with the younger people, monogamy is taking hold but, for me, that destroys some of the 'mystique'.

I don't want to be like other people--I want to be who I am--whether you like it or not and so I will always pick sex over a relationship. In fact, I had sex with all 4 exes before we became 'partners' and I have had sex with 7 out of 8 of those who are now my close friends. I don't need or want your approval--never have, never will--and that's why my friends are my friends.